Out on the Prowl

There is no perfection.

 

We are all imperfect. Sometime while browsing on Instagram we come across all these accounts that idolize this jet-setting/ fabulous lifestyle and it makes us feel kind of inadequate and small in a way, like we can never have that. We become jealous of the people we never met and those who can afford to travel all the time and purchase all the fresh off-the-rack clothes, while we go right down the block to 99c pizza. No shame. However an important detail is left out, the people we idolize are just people like all of us. We don’t know their struggles, worries, issues, insecurities…all we know is that the new make up tutorial they just posted was fire and their vlog from their trip to Paris FW was enviable- to say the least. We quickly jump to conclusions about “them” and us in a way inflicting harm onto ourselves with an imaginary knife of social media currency.

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Let’s stop labelling.

There comes a point when you realize that nothing is as it seems (sorry for being chiche…) and social media is an endless pool of created personas that really might not hold up in real life, this is why dehumanizing is so easy! We see it everywhere. Many popular accounts receive daily hate check ins, usually for no particular reason, words so hurtful that no one would ever dare to say them in person. Why is in so easy then? Because we are not actually talking, we are protected by the brigade of our digital screens.

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Where does social media(SM) fit in to our own self-image?

We base our life and compare it to those around us, before SM this was not as damaging because we were not so interconnected but today it is easier than ever to compare ourselves to our friends, random people, and colleagues especially on the digital space. It is human nature to compare after all…we compare ourselves to the people who sit next to us on the subway, stand next to us in the grocery store, what they wear and what we are wearing, makeup, hair, height, fitness level, their significant others, etc. with a click of a button you can go checkout Beyoncé’s Instagram and figure out your tomorrows outfit (I plead guilty). In the midst of doing all this we lose authenticity. I couldn’t count how many times I scrolled through different bloggers stuff and thought to myself: “Wow this has the EXACT same content and vibe I got from someone I was just looking at…”so why are people so afraid to express and be themselves without having to base who they are off of others as a baseline standard? All of this in the end comes down to self-awareness and self-worth.

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I had a conversation with my mom about both of those recently and how throughout your life as society shapes you, you start to lose your authentic self as you were born. It takes much soul-searching to find you and realize who you really are and want to become. This discovery of self is an ongoing investigation with no straight lines or directions and on top of it all we are completely lone rangin it, cue “Me, Myself, and I”. Every new experience that comes our way ends up in our memory bank and often shifts who we are and where we are going to end up from that point on. It’s a wild thing!

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I think the most important takeaway from all of this that I’ve noticed and learned so far is to simply be at peace with yourself. Nothing will ever be as good as having an internal calm and tranquility within your own being. Trust in the journey and trust yourself without judging those around you and even acting as the harshest critic of someone you already know, you. Make an effort to be less judgmental, I promise open-mindedness to others and your own actions is a wonderful thing but it is often not easy. Not entirely sure where I was going with this article but inspiration struck at 3am & half a bottle down of red wine so here we are with my scattered brains on your screen.

Always love, Berta xx

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  • Ludmilla Stevens-Filatov

    You are absolutely right. I knew and was friends with people who were on the top of the world: actors, writers, philosophers. I also talked and learned from homeless people and those who were outcasts. I don’t descriminate. God Complex is damaging to those are inflicted by it and even more so by those who succumb to it. People are people. There is a good book I use in my private practice: Escavating Your Authentic Self.
    Who intimidates you?
    Who do you intimidate?